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THE WIFE OF BATH'S PROLOGUE by Geoffrey Chaucer
A translation by Christine Gilbert

"Experience, even if there were no other authority
In the world, would be quite enough for me
To speak of the unhappiness that is in marriage;
For, gentlemen, since I was but twelve years old,
Thanks be to God who is eternal,
I have had five husbands at the church door-
If I can be considered properly married so many times-
And all were respectable men of their class.
But I was told, in no uncertain way, not long ago,
10 That since Christ only went but once
To a wedding, in Cana of Galilee,
By that same example he taught me
That I should not be married more than once.
Consider also, what sharp words,
Beside a well, Jesus, God and man,
Spoke to rebuke the Samaritan:
"You have had five husbands," he said,
"And that same man who you have now
Is not your husband," he certainly said.
20 What he meant by it, I cannot say;
But this I do ask, why the fifth man
Was no husband to the Samaritan woman?
How many was she allowed to have in marriage?
Never yet in all my life have I heard
A statement made about the precise number.
Men may guess and try to interpret texts, this way and that,
But I know, and say, without a lie,
God bade us expressly to wax and multiply;
That sensible text I can well understand.
30 Also I know well, how Jesus said my husband
Should leave his father, and mother, and take me.
But he made no mention of any number,
Concerning bigamy, or octagomy;
Why then should man speak badly of such things?
And hear this, how about Lord Solomon, the wise king;
I believe he had more wives than just one.
Would to God that it had been possible for me
To have been refreshed half so often as he!
What a gift from God he had with all his wives!
40 No man alive in this world has such an arrangement!
God knows, it seems to me, this noble king,
On the first night must have had a merry fit
With each of them, luck was with him in his life.
Blessed be to God that I have wedded five!
Welcome the sixth, whenever he comes along.
For in truth, I do not intend to keep myself chaste for long.
When my husband has passed away from this world,
Some Christian man will wed me again soon enough,
For then, the apostle says, I am free
50 To marry again, in a Godly way, when it pleases me.
He states that it is no sin to be married;
Better to be married than to burn.
What do I care, if people speak ill
Of wicked Lamech and his bigamy?
I know very well that Abraham was a holy man,
And Jacob as well, as far as I know;
And each of them had more than two wives,
And many another holy man as well.
Where can you say, at any time in history,
60 That high God prohibited marriage
By express word? I pray you, tell me.
Or where commanded he virginity?
I know as well as you; there are no two ways about it,
The apostle, when he spoke of virginity,
He said that he had no authority to command it.
Men may advise a woman to remain virginal,
But advising isn't ordering.
He left it to our own judgement;
For if God had ordered virginity,
70 Then he would have damned marriage by doing so.
And assuredly, if no seed was sown,
Virginity, then whereof should it grow?
St Paul dared not advise, in the least,
A thing about which Christ gave no direction.
The prize of the spear is set up for virginity:
Let everyone do his best, we'll see who runs fastest,
But this word does not apply to all,
Only where God is pleased to bestow it in his divine power.
I know well that St Paul was a virgin;
80 But nevertheless, though he wrote and said
He wished everyone to be like himself in this respect,
It is nothing more than advice.
And to be a wife he gave me permission
A reprieve; so it is not a matter for reproach
To marry; if my husband dies,
Without being accused of bigamy.
Though it would be admirable to touch no woman,-
He meant in his bed, or on his couch-
For it is dangerous to bring fire and flax together;
90 We know what this proverb means.
This is the sum of what Paul said, he held virginity
More perfect than marrying, given our weaknesses.
I must call it weakness, except when husband and wife
Wish to live together in chastity.
I'm perfectly happy about this, I have no envy,
Even if continence is morally preferable to marrying twice.
It pleases some to be undefiled, body and spirit;
Of my own self, I will make no boast.
For you know well, a Lord in his household,
100 Not every piece of his tableware is made of gold;
Some were made of wood, and still serve their owner's needs.
God calls people to him in various ways,
And everyone had from God some special gift of his own,
Some this, some that, as it pleases him to distribute them.
Virginity is great perfection,
And so is continence, when undertaken with devotion,
But Christ, who is the fountain-head of perfection,
Commanded that not every person should go sell
All that he has, and give it to the poor
110 And in such ways follow him and his footsteps.
He spoke to those that would live perfectly;
And gentlemen, with your permission, that I am not.
I will spend the flower of all my life
In the acts, and in the fruit of marriage.
Tell me also, to what purpose
Were the reproductive organs made,
And so perfectly was the body fashioned?
Believe you me, they were not made for nothing.
Interpret it as you like, and argue it up and down,
120 That they were made for the purgation
Of urine, and the little things which both men and women have
Were also to distinguish between male and female
And for no other cause,- what do you say?
But experience tells us it is not so.
So that the scholars are not angry with me,
I say this, that they are made for both,
That is to say, for emptying the bladder, and for
Sexual pleasure, in which we do not offend God.
Why else should men in their books reckon
130 That man shall surrender to his wife his debt?
Now how should he make his payment,
If he cannot use his simple tool?
It follows that they were made
To urinate, and also for procreation.
But I do not say that everyone is obliged
That has such sexual organs, as I tell you,
To go on and use them in procreation.
Then man should show little respect for virginity.
Christ was a virgin, and had a man's body,
140 And many a saint, since the world began;
Yet they lived forever in perfect chastity.
I will not envy virginity.
If they are as bread made from refined white flour,
Then let us be called wives of barley-bread;
And yet with barley-bread, Mark tells us,
Our Lord Jesus provided food for many a man.
In such condition as God has called us
I will persevere, I'm not precious.
In wifehood I will use my instrument
150 As freely as God had given it to me.
If I show any unwillingness, God give me sorrow!
My husband shall have it both evening and morning,
Whenever it pleases him to come forth and pay his debt.
A husband I will have, I will not be thwarted,
He shall be both my debtor and my slave,
And suffer the tribulations
Of his flesh, whilst I am his wife.
I have the power during all my life
Over his own body, and not him,
160 Just as the apostle told me;
And commanded our husbands to love us well.
This pronouncement is very much to my liking".
Up leapt the pardoner, immediately:
"Now madam", said he, "by God and by St John!
You are a noble preacher on this subject.
I was about to marry a wife, alas,
Why should I bring misery upon myself at such a price?
Now I will not marry this year at all!"
"Wait!" she said, "my tale is not begun.
170 No, you will drink from a different barrel,
Before I've done, you shall taste worse than ale.
And after I have finished telling you my tale
Of misery in marriage,
Of which I am an expert with a lifetimes experience-
That is to say, I have been the whip-
Then may you choose whether to sip of the cask
Of that same barrel that I shall open.
Be wary of it, before you get too close;
For I shall give more than ten illustrations.
180 "The man who disregards cautionary examples,
Will himself become one".
The same words were written by Ptolemy;
Read it in his greatest works, and learn it from there".
"Madam, I would pray you, if you would be so kind",
Said the Pardoner, "as you have begun,
Tell us your tale, hold back nothing, whoever objects,
And teach us young men of your experience".
"Gladly", she said, "since you wish it;
But this I pray to all the company,
190 If I speak according to my inclination or whim,
Do not take offence from what I say;
For my intention is but to amuse.
Now, sir, now will I relate to you my tale.
And never more may I drink wine or ale,
If this is not true. Those husbands that I had,
Of whom three were good, and two were bad.
The three who were good men, were rich, and old;
Scarcely might they carry out the contract of marriage
In which they were bound unto me.
200 You know well what I mean by this by God!
So help me God, I laugh when I think
How piteously at night I made them sweat labour!
And, by my faith, I cared nothing for their distress.
They had given me their land and their wealth;
There was no further need for me to exert myself
To gain their love, or treat them respectfully.
They loved me so much, by God above,
That I set no value on their love.
A wise woman will busy herself continuously
210 To obtain their love, so long as she has none.
But since I had them completely under my thumb,
And since they had given me all their land,
Why should I trouble myself to please them,
Except for my own profit and pleasure?
I set them to work, by my faith,
That many a night they sang "alas!"
The bacon was not set out for them, I believe,
That some men have in Essex at Dunmowe.
I governed them so well, in my own way,
220 That each of them was full blissful and willing
To bring me gay things from the fair.
They were very pleased when I spoke to them courteously;
For, God knows, I scolded them piteously!
Now let me tell you how well I managed things,
You wise wives, who can understand.
This is how you should speak to keep them in hand;
For half as boldly no man knows how to
Swear false oaths and lie, as a woman can.
I do not offer this to wives who are wise,
230 But for those when they make a mistake.
A wise wife shall, if she knows what is good for her,
Delude him into believing that black is white,
And use her own maid as a witness
The maid consenting to the deception; but listen how I spoke:
"Sir old dotard, is this how you carry on?
Why is my neighbour's wife so smartly dressed?
She is honoured wherever she goes;
I sit at home, I haven't a thing to wear.
What were you doing at my neighbour's house?
240 Is she so beautiful? Are you so amorous?
What do you whisper about with our maid? Heaven bless you!
Sir old lecher, give over these tricks.
And if I have an acquaintance or a friend,
In all innocence, you nag like a fiend,
If I walk or take a stroll in the direction of his house.
You come home as drunk as a mouse,
And lecture on your bench, a curse on you!
You say to me it is a great disadvantage
To marry a poor woman, for the expense involved;
250 And if she is rich, of high rank or birth,
Then you say that it is a torment
To suffer her pride and her black moods.
And if she is pretty, you rogue,
You say that every lecher wants her;
She cannot remain chaste, while
She assailed on every side.
You say some people desire us for our money,
Some for our body, and some for our looks,
And some because she can sing or dance,
260 And some for her good breeding and flirting;
Some for her delicate hands and arms:
So the devil take the lot in your opinion.
You say men cannot defend a castle wall,
When it is open to assault the whole time,
And should she be ugly, you say that she
Desires every man who she sets eyes on,
For like a spaniel she would leap on him,
Till she finds some man that she can keep.
There's no goose so grey there in the lake
270 As, you say, wishes to be without a mate.
And you say it is a hard thing to control
A thing which nobody would willingly keep.
Thus you say, pig, when you go to bed;
And that no wise man needs to be married,
Nor no man who has his mind fixed on heaven.
With wild thunder-bolts and fiery lightning
May your withered neck be broken!
You say that leaking houses, and also smoke,
And chiding wives make men flee
280 Out of their own houses; God bless us!
What ails such an old man, to make him scold like this?
You say we wives would hide our vices
Till we be married, and then we would show them-
Most certainly this is a saying of a shrewish old man!
You say that oxen, asses, horses and hounds,
Are tried out many times;
Basins, lavatories, are tested before being bought,
Spoons and stools, and all such household utensils,
And so are pots, clothes, and attire;
290 But men do not test women they intend to marry,
Before they are married; senile old fool!
And then, you say, we will show our vices.
You also say that it enrages me
If you don't praise my beauty,
And always gaze upon my face,
And call me 'fair dame' in every place.
And have a feast on the day
That I was born, and make me feel young and lively;
And I expect you to honour my nurse,
300 And my chambermaid within my bed-chamber
And my father's men and his relatives-
Thus you say, old barrel-full of lies!
And even our apprentice Janekin,
Because of his curly hair, shining as gold so fine,
And because he escorts me everywhere,
You have caught a false suspicion.
I don't want him at all, even if you died tomorrow!
But tell me this: why do you hide, plague take you!
The keys of your money chest away from me?
310 It is my property as well as yours, by God!
What, would you make an idiot of me, as lady of the house?
Now, by that Lord called St James,
You shall not have both, though you would,
Be master of my body and of my goods;
You're going to lose one of them, in spite of your wishes.
What profit is it to you to question or spy upon me?
I think you would like to lock me in a chest!
You should say, "wife, go where you wish;
Take your pleasure, I shan't listen to gossip.
320 I know you are a loyal wife, dame Alice".
We love no man that carefully watches over us
Wherever we go; we like to enjoy our liberty
Of all men blessed may he be,
The wise astrologer, Sir Ptolemy,
That gave us this proverb in his Almageste:
'Of all men his wisdom is the greatest
Who doesn't care how much another man's wealth exceeds his'.
By this saying you shall understand,
So long as you have all you want, why should you care
330 How happily other people get on?
For, assuredly, old fool, by your leave,
You'll have all the sex you want at night.
He is a terrible miser that would forbid
A man to light a candle at his lantern;
He shall not have a whit less light, by God.
If you have enough, you have no call for complaint.
You also say, that if you please us
With clothing, and with precious attire,
That is endangering our chastity;
340 And yet, devil take you! You have to rub the point in,
And say these words in the apostle's name:
"In clothes made with chastity and simplicity
You women must dress," he said,
"And not in tressed hair and lovely precious stones,
Such as pearls, nor with gold, nor rich clothes".
For your text and your instructions,
I care less than for a gnat.
You said that I was like a cat;
For whoever wished to singe a cat's coat,
350 Then the cat would stay at home all day, without going out;
And if the cat's coat be sleek and attractive,
She will not dwell at home half the day,
But out she will go, long before daybreak,
To how off her coat, and go on behaving lasciviously.
This is to say, if I am well dressed, sir shrew,
I will run out, to show my fine clothes.
Sir old fool, what profits you to spy on me?
Though you pray to Argus with his hundred eyes
To be my bodyguard, as he best knows how,
360 In faith, he shall not guard me unless it pleases me;
Yet I could outwit him, you can be sure!
You also said that there are three things,
Which trouble all this earth,
And that nobody can tolerate the fourth thing.
O dear sir shrew, Jesus shorten your life!
Yet you preach and say a hateful wife
Is one of these misfortunes.
Is there no other sort of comparison
That you may compare your proverbs to,
370 Other than a poor innocent wife?
You also compare a woman's love to hell,
To infertile land, where water may not dwell.
You compare it also to wild fire;
The more it burns, the more it desires
To consume everything that can be burnt.
You say, just as worms destroy a tree,
So a wife destroys her husband;
This is known by those who are bound to wives".
Gentlemen, as you will have understood,
380 Boldly I kept my husbands in hand
That they said all these things when they were drunk;
And everything was false, I could call as witness
On Jankin, and also on my niece.
O Lord! the distress I did them and the grief,
Although they were completely innocent, by God's sweet agony!
For as a horse could both bite and whine.
I could complain and scold, and yet I was in the wrong,
If I hadn't I should have been ruined.
Who is first to the mill, grinds first;
390 I complained first, so trouble was prevented.
They were very glad to exonerate themselves quickly
Of things which they had never been guilty in their lives.
I would accuse them of keeping mistresses,
When they were almost too ill to stand on their feet.
Yet I gave him pleasure, for he
Supposed that I loved him so possessively.
I swore that all my walking out at night
Was to spy upon mistresses that he lay with;
This pretence provided me with many a laugh.
400 For all such cunning is given to us at birth;
Deception, weeping, spinning tales, that God had given
To women as part of their nature, while they live.
And therefore of one thing I boast,
At the end I had the upper hand in every way,
By cunning, or force, or by some such manner,
For instance, by endless complaining or grumbling.
Especially in bed they had a miserable time:
There I would chide, and give them no enjoyment;
I would no longer stay in the bed,
410 If I felt his arm over my side,
Till he had made his payment to me (i.e. clothes, jewellery etc.)
Then I would allow him his little treat.
And therefore I tell this tale to every man,
Make profit where you can, for everything is for sale.
With empty hand men may not lure the hawk back.
In order to profit I would endure all his lust,
And pretend to be sexually excited;
And yet in old meat I never had sexual gratification;
It was for this reason that I was forever nagging them.
420 For even if the Pope had sat beside them,
I would not spare them at their own table;
For, on my honour, I paid them back word for word.
And Lord help me, God on high,
If I were now to make my will,
I don't owe them a word which hasn't been repaid.
I brought it about by cunning
That they must wisely give up the struggle,
Or else we would never have been at peace.
For though he looked like an enraged lion,
430 He would not get his way.
Then I would say, "Darling, take heed
How meek you look, like Wilkin, our sheep!
Come near, my spouse, let me kiss your cheek!
You should be all patient and meek,
And be of good conscience,
Since it is you who preaches of Job's patience. (OT: Job accepted all suffering)
Always be patient, practice what you preach;
And if you don't, certainly we shall teach you
That it's a better thing to live in peace with your wife.
440 One of us two must give way to the other, for sure;
And since men are more reasonable creatures
Than women, you must endure it patiently.
What ails you to grumble and groan?
Is it because you want to keep my puss to yourself alone?
Why, take it all! lo, have it every day!
By St Peter! I curse you, but love it well;
For if I would sell my nice little thing,
I could walk as sweet as a rose;
But I will keep it for your private enjoyment.
450 What a terrible man you are, by God! I say truly".
Such manner of arguments had passed between us.
Now I will speak of my fourth husband.
My fourth husband was a reveller;
That is to say, he had a mistress;
And I was young and full of passion and vitality,
Stubborn and strong, and as merry and talkative as a magpie.
How I could dance to a harp,
And sing, truly, as any nightingale,
When I had drunk a draught of sweet wine!
460 Metellius, the wicked churl, the swine,
Who, with a club murdered his wife,
For drinking wine, if I had been his wife,
He should not have intimidated me from drinking!
And after wine I can't help thinking about making love,
For just as sure as cold produces hail,
A lustful mouth must have a lustful tail.
But drunken women are easily seduced,-
This know lecherers from experience.
But, Lord Christ! it comes back to me
470 My youth, and my gaiety and vivacity,
It excites me about my heart root.
Up to this day it does my heart good
That I have had my fling in my day.
But age, alas, that likes to destroy everything,
Has stolen from me my beauty and my vigour.
Let it go, farewell; the devil take it!
The flower is gone, there is nothing more to tell;
The bran, as I best can, now I must sell;
But yet to be really cheerful I will endeavour.
480 Now I will tell you of my fourth husband.
As I was saying, I had in my heart great anger
That he should find his pleasure in some other woman.
But he was repaid, by God and by St Judocus!
I made him of the same wood as a cross; (prov. made him as angry & jealous as her)
Not by committing adultery, in no foul manner,
But certainly, I was so charming to others
That in his own grease I made him fry
In his own anger, and jealousy.
By God! I made a purgatory for him on earth,
490 For which I hope his soul be in heaven.
For, God knows, he sat very often and cried out,
When his shoe pinched him most painfully.
There was no person, except God and he, that knew,
In many ways, how grievously I tormented him.
He died when I came from Jerusalem,
And lies buried under the rood beam,
In a tomb not so elaborate, or skilfully made
As was the tomb of that man Darius,
Which the craftsman Apelles made skilfully;
500 It would have been a waste to bury him preciously.
Farewell to him, God give his soul rest!
He is now in his grave and in his chest.
Now of my fifth husband will I tell.
God let his soul never go to hell!
And yet was he to me cruellest of all five;
Which I feel on my ribs row by row,
And ever shall until my dying day.
But in our bed he was so fresh and gay,
And he knew well how to persuade me,
510 When he would have my bele chose,
That though he had me beaten on every bone,
He could win again my love straightaway.
I believe I loved him best, because he
Was hard to please as a lover.
We women have, I shall not lie,
In this matter a peculiar view;
Whatever thing we may not easily have,
We shall cry to be given it all day and crave.
Deny us things, that we desire;
520 Pursue us closely, and then we will flee.
As though reluctantly, we lay out all the goods we have to sell;
Prices rise as the number of buyers increases,
And to price cheaply is considered of little worth:
This knows every woman that is wise.
My fifth husband, God bless his soul!
Whom I married for love, and not wealth,
He was a scholar at Oxford for some time,
And had left school, and became a boarder in the house
With my gossip and friend, living in our town;
530 God have mercy on her soul! her name was Alisoun.
She knew my heart, and also my personal affairs,
Better than our parish priest, I assure you!
To her I confessed all my secrets.
For whether my husband pissed on a wall,
Or committed a capital crime that should have cost his life,
To her, and to another worthy wife,
And to my niece, who I loved well,
I would have told his secrets every bit.
And so I did very often, God knows,
540 That made his face often red and hot
For absolute shame, and blamed himself for he
Had told to me so great a secret.
And so it happened that once during Lent-
So many times to my friend I went,
For ever yet I loved to be gay,
And to walk in March, April, and May,
From house to house, to pick up bits of gossip-
That Jankin the scholar, and my friend Dame Alice,
And I myself, went into the fields.
550 My husband was in London all that Lent;
I had the better opportunity to play,
And to see, and also to be seen
By the gay crowd. How could I tell when
I was fated to meet my destined lover, or where?
Therefore I made my visits
To Vigils and to processions,
To sermons also, and to pilgrimages,
To miracle-plays, and to marriages,
And I wore my bright scarlet gowns.
560 No worms, no moths, no parasites,
I'll take an oath, never devoured them a bit;
And do you know why? For they were well used.
Now I will tell you what happened to me.
I say that we walked in the fields,
Till truly we had such flirtation,
This scholar and I, that of my future,
I spoke to him and told him how he,
If I were widowed, should marry me.
For certainly, I say not merely to boast,
570 Yet I was never without thoughts
Of marriage, and of other things as well!
I hold a mouse's heart not worth a leek
That has but one hole to run to,
If that fails, then everything is finished.
I led him to believe he had enchanted me,-
My gossip Alis, taught me that tactic.
And I also said I dreamed of him all night,
That he wished to slay me as I lay upright,
And all my bed would be full of real blood;
580 But yet I hope that he shall do me good,
For blood signifies gold, as I was taught.
And all was false; I did not dream of it at all,
I followed all my teacher's advice,
Of this as of other things more.
But now, gentlemen, let me see, what was I saying?
A-ha! by God, I have my tale again.
When my fourth husband was ready for burial,
I wept continually, and behaved as though I were miserable,
As wives must, for it is custom,
590 And with my kerchief covered my face,
But because I had provided myself with another mate,
I wept little, and that I declare.
To church was my husband born the next day
With neighbours, who felt sorrow for him;
And Jankin, our scholar, was one of them.
As help me God! when I saw him go
Behind the coffin, it struck me he had a pair
Of legs and of feet so shapely and attractive
That I lost my heart to him completely.
600 He was, I swear, twenty winters old,
And I was forty, if I should say so;
But I always had a youthful desire and inclination.
Gap-toothed was I, and that became me well;
I had the imprint and seal of St Venus.
As help me God! I was a lusty one,
And fair, and rich, and young, and well off;
And truly, as my husbands told me,
I had the best you-know-what you could imagine!
For certainly, I am all Venus
610 In feeling, and my heart comes under the influence of Mars.
Venus gave me my lust, my sexual eagerness,
And Mars gave me my sturdy boldness;
My star sign was Taurus, and Mars was in it at the time.
Alas, alas, that ever love-making was sin!
I always followed my impulse
By force of astrological influences;
That made me so that I could not refuse
My chamber of Venus from a good fellow.
Yet I have Mars' mark upon my face,
620 And also in another private place.
For as God so wise be my salvation,
I never loved with restraint,
But always followed my appetite,
Whether he were short or tall, dark or fair;
I took no notice, so long as he liked me,
How poor he was, nor to what class he belonged.
What more can I say? but, at the end of the month,
This merry scholar, Jankin, who was so charming,
Had married me with ceremony and celebration;
630 And to him I gave all the land and possessions
That had ever been given to me.
But afterwards I regretted this very painfully;
He would allow me none of the things I liked or wanted.
By God! he struck me once on the ear,
Because I tore a page out of his book,
And due to that strike my ear became deaf.
I was as stubborn as a lioness,
And of my tongue an indefatigable chatterbox,
And I would walk, as I had done before,
640 From house to house, despite what he swore;
For which he would often preach,
And tell me of tales from Roman history;
How that man Simplicius Gallus left his wife,
And forsook her for the rest of his life,
Simply because he saw her with her hair uncovered
Looking out of his door one day.
Another Roman he told me of by name,
That, because his wife was at a midsummer festival
Without his knowledge, he forsook her as well.
650 And then he would search in his Bible for
That same proverb of Ecclesiastes
Where he commands, and strictly forbids,
Man to allow his wife to gad about.
Then he would say right then, without a doubt:
"Whoever builds his house out of willow-branches,
And spurs his blind horse over the fallow ground,
and allows his wife to go on pilgrimages to holy places,
Is worthy to be hanged on the gallows!"
But all for nothing, I didn't care a jot
660 For his proverbs and for his old saying,
Nor would I allow myself to be checked by him.
I hate a man who tells me of my vices,
And so do more of us, God knows, than I.
This made him furious with me;
I simply couldn't bring myself to give in to him.
Now I will tell you truly, by St Thomas,
Why I tore a page out of his book,
For which he struck me so that I was made deaf.
He had a book that eagerly, night and day,
670 For his amusement he would always read;
He called it Valerie and Theo fraste, (two treatises against marriage)
At which book he laughed continually.
And also there was at one time a scholar from Rome,
A cardinal, who was called St Jerome,
Who wrote a book which opposed Jovinian;
In which also included Tertullian,
Crisippus, Trotula, and Heloise,
Who, an abbess, not far from Paris;
And also the Book of Proverbs,
680 Ovid's Art, and many other books,
And all these were bound together in one volume.
And every night and day was his habit,
When he had leisure
From other professional occupations,
To read this book about wicked wives.
He knew more legends and biographies of them
Than there are of good wives in the Bible.
For believe you me, it is an impossibility
That any scholar would speak goodly of wives,
690 Unless it were of the lives of holy Saints,
Not of any other woman, never at all.
Who painted the lion, tell me who?
By God! if women had written stories,
As scholars have within their small monastery rooms,
They would have written of men who are more wicked
Than all the sons of Adam could put right.
Those born under Mercury and Venus (scholars and attractive women)
Are completely different in behaviour and outlook;
Mercury loves wisdom and science,
700 And Venus loves pleasure and extravagance.
And, by reason of their contrary natures,
Each planetary influence is strongest when the other is weakest
And therefore, God knows, Mercury is powerless
In Pisces, whereas Venus is ascendant;
And Venus falls when Mercury rises.
Therefore no woman is praised by any scholar.
The scholar, when he is old, and is no longer capable of
Of Venus's work than an old shoe,
Then he sits down, and writes in his senile folly
710 That women cannot keep to their marriage vows and remain faithful.
But now my object, why I told you
That I was beaten because of a book, by God!
At night Jankin, who was my lord and master,
Read his book, as he sat by the fire,
First about Eve, who for her wickedness,
All mankind was brought to wretchedness,
For which Jesus Christ himself was killed,
Who redeemed us with his life again.
Listen, hear what he explicitly stated about women,
720 That women brought about the loss of all mankind.
Then he read to me how Sampson lost his hair:
While sleeping, his lover cut it with her scissors;
Through which betrayal he lost both his eyes.
Then again he read to me, and I tell you no lie,
Of Hercules and of his wife Deianira,
That caused him to set himself on fire.
He omitted no detail of the worry and the misery
That Socrates had with his two wives;
How Xantippa threw piss upon his head.
730 This innocent old man sat still as though he were dead;
He wiped his head, he dared say nothing,
Except "Rain has to fall before the thunder will stop!"
Of Phasipha, who was the queen of Crete,
As a case of wickedness, this seemed to him a fine story;
Fie! Speak no more- it is a terrible thing-
Of her horrible lust and her desires.
Of Clytemnestra, for her lechery,
Who treacherously killed her husband,
He read it in all seriousness.
740 He also told me by what circumstances
Amphiaraus at Thebes lost his life.
My husband had a tale of his wife,
Eriphyle, who for a clasp of gold
Had privately told the Greeks
Where her husband hid,
For which he had at Thebes a sorry end.
Of Livilla he told me, and of Lucilia:
They were both responsible for their husbands deaths;
One of them for love, the other for hate.
750 Livilla, late at night,
Had poisoned her husband, for she hated him;
Lucilia, lustful, loved her husband so much
That, in order to cause him to always think of her,
She gave him such a powerful form of love-potion
That he was dead by the time morning arrived;
And therefore in every way husbands had a bad end.
Then he told me how a man called Latumius
Complained to his close friend Arrius
That in his garden there grew a tree
760 Of which he said how his three wives
Hanged themselves out of a broken heart.
"One dear friend", said this Arrius,
"Give me a cutting of this blessed tree,
And in my garden I shall plant it".
Later on, he read about wives
Some of whom had killed their husbands in their bed,
And let their lover lay with them all the night,
When the corpse lay stretched out on the floor, face upwards.
And some women had driven nails into their brains,
770 While they slept, and killed them in this way.
Some poured poison in their drinks.
He spoke of more harm than the heart can imagine;
And in fact he knew of more proverbs
Than grass or herbs that grow in this world.
"It is better," said he, "to live
With a lion or an evil dragon,
Than with a woman habitually nagging".
"It is better," said he, "to live up in the attic,
Than with an angry wife down in the house;
780 They are so wicked and perverse,
They always hate whatever gives their husbands pleasure".
He said, "a woman throws her shame away,
When she throws off her virginity"; and furthermore,
"A pretty woman, unless she is also chaste,
Is like a gold ring in a pig's nose".
Who could suppose, or who imagine,
The misery that was in my heart, and the pain?
And when I saw he would never stop
Reading this cursed book all night,
790 All of a sudden three pages did I pluck
Out of his book, as he read, and also
With my fist I struck him on the cheek
That he fell over backwards into the fire.
And he started up like a mad lion,
And with his fist he struck me on the head,
That I lay on the floor as though I were dead.
And when he saw how still I lay,
He was terrified, and would have run away,
Till at last out of my swoon I awoke.
800 "O, have you killed me, false thief?" I said,
"And for my land have you murdered me?
And yet before I die, I will kiss you".
And he came near, and kneeled down submissively,
And said, "Dear sister Alisoun,
So help me God! I shall never strike you again.
What I have done, you yourself are to blame,
Forgive me, I beg you most sincerely!"
And yet immediately afterwards I hit him on the cheek,
And said, "Thief, I have this much revenge;
810 Now I will die, I can no longer speak".
But at last, with much worry and grief,
We came to an agreement between the two of us.
He put all the bridel into my hand,
To have the control over house and land,
And over his tongue, and also his hand;
And I made him burn his book there and then.
And when I had obtained unto me,
By mastery, all the sovereignty,
Then he said, "My own true wife,
820 Do just as you please, for as long as you live;
But guard your reputation and respect my reputation"-
After that day we never argued again.
God help me, I was as kind to him
As any wife from Denmark to the Indes,
And just as faithful, and so was he to me.
I pray to God, who sits in majesty,
Therefore to bless his soul for dear mercy.
Now I will tell my tale, if you will listen".
The Friar laughed, when he heard this;
830 "Now Madam", he said, "as I hope for bliss in heaven,
This is a long preamble to a tale!"
And when the Summoner heard the Friar speak,
"Listen," said the Summoner, "On God's two arms!
A Friar will be forever interfering.
Listen, good men, a fly and also a Friar
Likes to drop into every dish and every subject.
What do you say of making a perambulation?
What! amble, or trot, or be quiet, or go and sit down!
You interrupt our amusement in this subject".
840 "So, that's how you want it, sir Summoner?" said the Friar;
"Now, by my faith, I shall, before I go,
Tell a tale or two about a Summoner,
That all the pilgrims in this place will be laughing".
"Now for that, Friar, I curse your mouth",
Said the Summoner, "and I swear,
If I don't tell two or three tales
Of Friars, before I come to Sittingbourne,
That shall make your heart grieve,
For I can see that you've lost your temper now".
850 Our Host cried "Peace! and I mean straightaway!
And said, "Let the woman tell her tale.
You act as people who are drunk.
Proceed, madam, tell us your tale, and that is best".
"All ready, sir," she said, "just as you please,
If I have permission from this worthy Friar".
"By all means, madam," he said, "tell forth, and I will listen".



THE WIFE OF BATH'S TALE

(a draft)

In the old days of King Arthur,
Of whom the British speak very honourably,
There were fairies in every corner of the realm.
860 The queen of the fairies, with her merry company,
Danced very often in many a green meadow.
This was the old belief, as I understand;
I speak of many hundreds of years ago.
But now no man can see elves any more,
For now the great charitable works and prayers
Of limiters and other holy friars,
(limiters = friars licensed to beg within a specified district. Puts Friar in his place)
Who visit every country and every stream,
As numerous as motes in the sunshine,
Blessing halls, chambers, kitchens, bedrooms,
870 Cities, towns, castles, high towers,
Villages, barns, stables, dairies-
This widespread 'blessing' is responsible for there being no more fairies.
For in the place previously frequented by fairies,
There now walks the limiter himself,
In afternoons and in mornings,
And says his morning prayers and his devotions
As he goes in his appointed district.
Women may now go safely up and down.
In every bush or under every tree
880 There is no other evil spirit but he,
And he will not do them anything but dishonour.
And so it happened that this king Arthur
Had among his entourage a pleasant knight,
Who came riding from hawking for water-fowl one day;
And it happened that, alone as he rode,
He saw a maid walking in front of him,
Of which this woman immediately, despite all she could do,
By absolute force, he robbed her of her virginity;
For which rape there was such an outcry
890 And such petition to king Arthur,
That this knight was condemned to death,
By course of law, and should have lost his head-
Perhaps such was the law at the time-
But the queen and other ladies as well
Begged the king to show clemency,
Till his life was granted to him on the spot,
And given to the queen, at her complete discretion,
To choose whether she would have him saved or put to death.
The queen thanked the king with all her heart,
900 And after this she spoke to the knight,
When she saw him, one day:
"You stand here," she said," in such a plight
That of your life you cannot have any certainty.
I will grant you your life, if you can tell me
What it is that women most desire.
Take care, and keep the axe from your neck!
And if you cannot tell me straightaway,
I will give you leave to go
For one year and one day, to seek out and discover
910 A satisfactory answer on this subject;
And security I will have, before you leave,
To return here and give yourself up at the end of the time period".
Miserable was this knight, and sorrowfully he sighed;
But what, he has little choice in the matter.
And at last he chooses to go,
And come again, at the end of the year,
With such answers as God would provide him with;
And takes his leave, and wends forth his way.
He searches every house and every place
920 Where he hopes to find his mercy,
To learn of what thing women love most;
But he could not discover any country
Where he might find in this matter
Two creatures agreeing together.
Some said women love wealth best,
Some said a dignified position, some said cheerfulness,
Some beautiful clothes, some said sexual pleasure,
And others to be widowed and wedded.
Some said that our hearts are satisfied the greatest
930 When we are flattered and pleased.
He comes very close to the truth, I will not lie.
A man shall gain us best with flattery;
And with dutiful service, and with attentiveness,
We are caught, whatever our rank.
And some say that we love best
To be free, and do just as it pleases us,
And have no man rebuke us for our misbehaviour,
But say that we are wise, and not at all foolish.
For truly there is not one of us,
940 If any person will rub us on a sore spot,
Who won't lash out in irritation, at being told the plain truth.
Test, and he shall find whoever does so;
For, we are never so vicious within,
We will be considered wise and undefiled of sin.
And some say that we have great delight
To be considered constant, and also discreet,
And to remain in one purpose steadfastly,
And not reveal things that men tell us.
But that tale is not worth a rake-handle.
950 By God, we women can keep nothing secret;
Look at Midas, for example,-will you hear the tale?
Ovid, amongst other little things,
Said Midas had, under his long hair,
Two asses ears growing upon his head,
He hid this defect, as best he could,
Very carefully from every mans sight,
That, except for his wife, no other person knew of it.
He loved her dearly, and trusted her too;
He begged her that to no one
960 She would ever tell of his deformity.
She swore she would not, for anything in the world,
She would not do that shameful deed or sin,
To make her husband be called disgraceful names.
She would not tell of it for her own modesty.
But none the less, it seemed to her that she would die,
If she should hide a secret for so long;
It seemed the secret oppressed her so painfully about her heart
That some hint of the truth simply must break through her guard;
And since she dared tell it to no man,
970 She ran quickly down to a marsh-
Till she arrived there, her heart was on fire-
And as a bittern booms in the fen,
She laid her mouth down to the water:
"Do not reveal me, you water, with your sound,"
She said; "to you I tell it and to no other;
My husband has two long asses ears!
Now my heart is completely cured, now it is out.
I couldn't have kept the secret any longer, that's certain".
Here you may see, though we can keep a secret for a short while,
980 It must eventually come out; we can keep no secret.
The rest of the tale if you will listen,
Read Ovid, and there you may learn.
This knight, of whom my tale is particularly concerned with,
When he realised that he might not gain possession or knowledge of it-
That is to say, what it is women love most-
Within his breast his spirit was very sorrowful.
But he continued to search, he could not delay;
The day arrived that he must return home.
And on his way he chanced to ride,
990 In all his worry, through a forest,
Where he saw dancing
Twenty- four ladies, or more; (fairies)
Towards this dance he advanced eagerly,
In hope that he should learn some wisdom.
But certainly, before he reached them,
The circle of dancers vanished, he knew not where.
No creature saw he who bore life,
Except a humble woman he saw sitting on the grass;
An uglier person you could not imagine.
1000 She rose and faced him,
And said, "Sir knight, go no further.
Tell me what you seek, on your faith!
Perhaps it may be better;
Old people understand many things," she said.
"My dear mother," said this knight, "assuredly
I'm a dead man, if I cannot say
What it is that women desire most.
Could you give me the answer, I would repay your service generously".
"Pledge me your solemn word with your hand," she said,
1010 "The next thing I ask of you,
You must do, if it is in your power,
And I will tell you the answer before nightfall".
"You have my word," said the knight, "I will".
"Then," she said, "I can easily boast
That your life is safe; for I assure you,
Upon my life, the queen will agree with me.
Show me who is the highest in rank of them all,
Who wears a kerchief or a head-dress,
Who dares to say that I will not teach you.
1020 Let us proceed, without saying anything more".
Then she whispered a message in his ear,
And commanded him to be happy, and have no fear.
When they arrived at the court, this knight
Said he had kept his undertaking to return on that day, as he had promised,
And his answer was ready, as he ventured.
Very many noble wives, and many maids,
And many widows, because widows are wise,
The queen herself sitting as president of the court,
Was assembled, ready to hear his answer;
1030 And afterwards this knight was commanded to enter.
Every person was ordered to be silent,
In order for the night to tell everyone
What it is which professional women love best.
The knight stood silent as he did best,
But he immediately answered the question
With a loud voice, so all the court could hear:
"My liege lady, everywhere," he said,
"Women desire to have sovereignty
Over her husband as well as her love,
1040 And to have the upper hand in her dealings with him.
This is what you desire most, even if you kill me for saying so.
Do as you wish; I am here at your will".
In all the court there was no wife, no maid,
No widow, who contradicted what he said,
But said he was worthy of keeping his life.
And with these words up leapt the old woman,
Who the knight had seen sitting on the grass:
"Mercy," she said, "My supreme lady queen!
Before your court leaves, do me justice.
1050 I told this answer to the knight;
For which he promised me faithfully,
The first thing I asked of him,
He would do, if it was in his power.
Before the court then I pray you, sir knight,"
She said, "that you will take me as your wife;
For you know well that I have saved your life.
If I am wrong, contradict me, upon your faith!"
The knight answered, "Alas, and alas!
I know very well that this was my promise.
1060 For Gods' love, make some other request;
Take all my goods and property, and release me".
"No, then," she said, "I curse us both!
For though I am ugly, and old, and poor,
I refuse to for all the metal, nor for ore,
That is buried underground, or lies above,
Unless I were your wife, not only your legal spouse but your darling".
"My love?" he said, "no, my damnation!
Alas, that a man of my high birth
Should ever be so shamefully dishonoured!"
1070 But all for nothing; the result is this, that he
Was compelled to marry her;
And take his old wife, and go to bed.
Now some men would say, perhaps,
That out of carelessness I overlook
Telling you the joy and all the preparations
That was at the feast that same day.
To which I shall shortly answer:
I say there was no joy nor feast at all;
There was nothing but depression and great sorrow.
1080 For he married her secretly the next day,
And for all the days which followed avoided company like an owl,
So miserable he was, that his wife was so ugly.
Great was the misery in the knight's thoughts,
When he was brought to bed with his wife;
He tosses and he turns to and fro.
His old wife lay smiling constantly,
And said, "O dear husband, God bless us!
Does every knight behave with his wife like this?
Is this the law of king Arthur's court?
1090 Is every knight of his so disdainful? (when the knight should have been sexually reserved he had dishonoured himself. Marriage to a physically repulsive wife is proper retribution for his offence against the standards of knightly conduct).
I am your own love and also your wife;
I am she who saved your life,
And, assuredly, I have never done you wrong;
Why do you treat me like this on our first night?
You act like a man who is out of his mind.
What is my sin? For Gods' love, tell me it,
And it shall be amended, if I it is in my power".
"Amended," said the knight, "alas, no, no!
It can never be altered.
1100 You are so hideously repulsive, and so old,
And in addition you come from such a base stock,
That it is little wonder why I toss and turn.
Would to God that my heart would burst!"
"Is this," she said, "The cause of your unrest?"
"Yes, certainly," he said, "it is no wonder".
"Now, sir," she said, "I can amend this,
If you wish me to, before three days have passed,
With such effect that you would behave very respectfully towards me.
But, since you mention such nobility/distinction
1110 As is descended out of old wealth,
That you should be considered gentlemen on account of your rich ancestors,
Such arrogance is not worth a hen.
Whoever is the most virtuous,
Both in private and in public, and always endeavours the most
To behave as nobly and courteously as he is able;
Take him for the greatest noble man.
Christ wishes us to derive our virtuous qualities from him,
Not of our ancestors for their old wealth.
For though they give us all our heritage,
1120 For which we claim to have noble ancestry,
Yet may they not bequeath, by no means whatever,
To none of us their virtuous habit of life,
That made them be called courteous men,
And commanded us to follow them in the same fashion.
Well can the wise poet of Florence,
That was called Dante, speak in this opinion.
Listen, in such kind of rhyme is Dante's tale:
"Very rarely by his small branches rises up
Man's excellence, for God, of his goodness,
1130 Desires that of him we claim our nobility";
For of our ancestors may we claim nothing
But worldly goods, that may be damaged.
Also every person knows this as well as I,
If nobility were implanted as an innate quality
Within a particular family through descent,
Private and plain, then they would never stop
To perform all the praiseworthy actions appertain to a gentleman;
They would be incapable of any discourteous or shameful act:
Take fire, and carry it into the darkest house
1140 Between this place and the Caucasian mountains,
And let men shut the doors and then go;
Yet will the fire blaze vigorously
As though thousands of people were watching it;
It will continue to behave in accordance with its proper nature,
I'm ready to swear, until it dies.
Here you may see well how nobility
Is not dependent upon wealth,
Since people do not observe the laws which should govern their behaviour
Constantly, as does the fire, according to its nature.
1150 For, God knows, men may frequently find
A gentleman's son to be modest and shameful;
And he who wishes to be respected for his high birth,
For he was born in a noble house,
And had noble and virtuous ancestors,
But will not himself act nobly,
He is not noble, be he duke or earl;
For a man is considered a churl if he behaves like a villain.
Your nobility is not renowned
1160 Of your ancestors, acquired by their great virtue,
Which is not an integral part of yourself.
For nobility comes from God alone.
True nobility is a grace derived from God;
It was not a thing bequeathed to us with our social rank.
Consider how noble, as says Valerius,
Was that same Tullius Hostillius,
Who rose out of poverty to high nobility.
Study Seneca, and grasp the meaning of Boethius;
There you shall see expressed it is beyond dispute
1170 That he is noble who performs noble deeds.
And therefore, dear husband, I thus conclude:
Although my ancestors were poor,
Yet may the high God, I hope,
Grant me permission to live virtuously.
I am to be considered gentle when I begin
To live virtuously and refrain from sin.
And where you of poverty I reproach,
The high God, in whom we believe,
In wilful poverty chooses to live his life.
1180 And assuredly every man, maiden, or wife,
May understand that Jesus, king of heaven,
Would never choose an immoral way of life.
Being content with limited means is an honest thing, certainly;
Scholars support this view.
Whoever feels content with his poverty,
I consider to be rich, even if he does not own a shirt.
Not the man who has little, but he who covets to have more, is the poor man,
For he would have the thing which he cannot possess;
But he who has nothing, nor covets to have,
1190 Is wealthy, although you consider him to be only a menial.
Genuine poverty, it sings of its own nature;
Juvenal says jokingly of poverty:
"The poor man, when he passes along the road,
In front of the thieves he may sing and play".
Poverty is an unattractive blessing and, as I suppose,
A very great encourager of hard work;
Also a great improver of wisdom
To he who takes it in patience.
Poverty is this, although it seems miserable,
1200 A thing which no one asks to possess.
Poverty very often, when a man is wretched,
Teaches him to know himself and his God.
Poverty is an eye-glass, it seems to me,
Through which he can see his true friends.
And therefore, sir, since I give you no cause for complaint,
You can no longer reproach me for my poverty.
Now, sir, of being old you reproach me;
And certainly, sir, even if there were no authority
In a text of this opinion, persons of noble reputation
1210 Say that men should behave respectfully towards the aged,
And call him father, out of good manners;
And writers are to be found who have expressed this opinion, I would think.
Now wherever you say that I am ugly and old,
Then you needn't fear being made a cuckold;
For dirtiness and old age, as I hope to prosper,
Are wonderful guardians of chastity.
But nevertheless, since I recognise your need for sexual pleasure,
I shall satisfy your sexual urge.
Choose now", she said, "one of these two things:
1220 To have me ugly and old until I die;
And be to you a true, humble wife,
And never displease you all my life;
Or else have me young and beautiful,
And take your chance of what may follow
The stream of visitors whom I shall attract to your house,
Or in some other place, very likely.
Now decide for yourself, whichever pleases you".
The knight reflects, and sighs,
But at last he says in this manner:
1230 "My lady and my love, and wife so dear,
I put myself in your wise control;
Choose yourself which would give you the most pleasure,
And bring the most dignity and respect to you as well as me.
It's of no consequence to me whichever of the two;
For if you are happy, it satisfies me".
"Then have I gained the upper hand over you", she said,
"Since I may choose and do as it suits me?"
"Yes, certainly, wife", he said, "I consider it best".
"Kiss me", she said, "we are no longer enemies;
1240 For, by my troth, I will be both to you,
That is to say, yes, both beautiful and good.
I pray to God that I may die insane,
If I am not both virtuous and faithful to you
As any wife ever was, since the beginning of the world.
And if tomorrow I am not as beautiful to look at
As any lady, or empress, or queen,
Who is between the east and the west,
Do with my existence as you please.
Lift up the curtain, look at how it is".
1250 And when the knight saw all this for real,
That she was so beautiful, and so young,
He embraced her in his arms, elated,
Almost out of his mind with joy.
A thousand times in succession he kissed her,
And she obeyed him in everything
That might give him pleasure or enjoyment.
And thus they lived until they died
In perfect joy; and Jesus Christ sends us
Husbands who are meek and young, and full of sexual vigour,
1260 And power, or luck, to outlive he whom we married;
And also I pray Jesus shortens his life
Who will not be controlled by his wife;
And old and angry misers,
God sends them soon a real plague!








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